Butt plugs as cause of death are a much bigger problem in this world than in ours. I don't have the statistics to prove that butt-plug-related fatalities aren't a huge problem in our world. Maybe that story is out there waiting to be found. (Get on that, Washington Post!) But in author J.D. Frettier's paranormal romantic comedy series The Green Room Chronicles
, butt plugs are accessories to Bonnie's death in Desperately Seeking Sixty-Nine, and then Linda's death in LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING. I don't know what killed Bonnie's chatty BFF Dee, but I have my suspicions.
I hesitate to use the word "hilarious" in any context except complaining about the word "hilarious," but oh my god, LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING can be hilarious. The sequence where our frustrated (ahem) female lead disputes her online order with a disembodied voice named Josh set me up for the whole day. Author J.D. Frettier knows what she did, too, because Dee (who I will have finished turning into in about ten years) sees the story coming from a mile away.
"I bought 'em all. Every shape, size, and color I could find. It was orgasmic... until I did some discount shopping."
"Why do I think you're about to share something that is gonna make me piss my pants?"
It makes me a bit sad that the best joke in the first book in the series, Desperately Seeking Sixty-Nine, gets explained to the reader in LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING, as if author J.D. Frettier lost confidence in it. I'm inclined to defend it. The name of the Green Room's garden is a good joke. Fight me.
There are a couple of times when the references used in LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING don't quite work. The description of Bonnie and Peter as "Barbie and Ken" doesn't track for me, considering the galloping sterility of the dolls (and Ken's famous lack of penis). Barbie and Ken, as a couple, could not be less like the inseparable Bonnie and Peter.
When female lead Linda apologizes that her life story "isn't so Romeo and Juliet," my reaction is to say "Great!" because that's a play about a flaky adult man using a naive teenage girl for sex and how his irresponsible behaviour drives them both to suicide. The only thing Romeo and Juliet has in common with the great love of Desperately Seeking Sixty-Nine is that everyone involved is dead. This is more about the flaws in the Great Romance canon than it is about author J.D. Frettier, but offhand references to Romeo and Juliet activate me like the Manchurian Candidate. #TeamRosaline
LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING is the second in a series, but if you find yourself trapped on Saturn's moon Titan, you can read it standalone and still enjoy it. The world of the Green Room is reintroduced for the newcomer, and then expanded in pleasing ways. Author J.D. Frettier takes a couple of unnecessary risks during the course of the story, and only you know how much your enjoyment of LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING will be affected by this or that. I enjoyed LINDA GETS HER GROOVE THING more than Desperately Seeking Sixty-Nine, and after rolling my eyes at its weaknesses, I landed on the same rating.